O&G - Done!

One of the most stressful days ever. Let's just say this placement never really got my heart rate and blood pressure up until today (my last day). Waited to do my final assessment with my supervisor and I was really stressed out. Hate waiting around. You see if this was one day earlier, I would not be as stressed out. I was a bit of a smart ass and booked to leave for home 1 day before official holiday. Seriously talk about luck. Supervisor couldn't do my assessment until my final day...5 hours before the departure of my train to go to the airport. Essentially, we are allowed to resit our assessment if our supervisor believe we are incompetent. You would usually resit the assessment immediately or the week after, BUT because we are doing our assessment in the final week  on my last day of placement, I don't really get another go. So that means I have ONE shot at this assessment. I pass...I pass. I fail...let's just say that is NOT an option. I essentially needed a bit of skill (to pass the assessment) and a heck lot of luck to not only pass my assessment, but to also catch my train. Doing an assessment is already stressful enough especially when you've got only 1 shot at it. Travelling is also another very stressful thing. Put the two together (assessment AND travelling) is the formula for a heart attack. Yes why should I be worrying about my assessment? I worked hard. I came in every day. Didn't skive. Studied...a bit. Practiced my examination skills quite a bit. So why am I not confident? Simple. Anything can happen eg. bad luck such as getting a difficult patient, blanking out aka brain fart, nerves, etc. I think I'm pretty chill with my supervisor and I don't really "fear" him that much, BUT at the end of the day yes he is a person...but he is also my SUPERVISOR, which I cannot forget. He essentially is the one who determines whether I pass or fail this placement. Kind of hard not to be a bit scared/nervous/stressed/intimidated.

Anyways luckily I passed my assessment and it all went very well. Got all my forms signed off, handed in my locker keys, and next thing I knew, I was saying my goodbyes to the staff and shaking hands with my supervisor: "I guess that's it. 7 weeks. Done. I really enjoyed the placement. Thank you. Maybe we will meet again in the future, maybe not. It was a pleasure to meet you and your team. Thanks again." It was probably the first genuine "thank you" I have said to a supervisor at the end of a placement. These last 7 weeks have opened my eyes and taught me not to judge. I have never done so much active learning in one placement. Best bit: I wanted to learn. I wasn't forced. What a great overall placement. I guess the only way to show your gratitude towards a placement is to work hard and show that you have learned. Actions certainly do speak louder than words. Even my good friend said that if only my supervisor saw what type of student I was on placements and how much I have changed in terms of motivation and work ethic - only then it is obvious how much I enjoyed this placement.

What a placement. Who would've thought.

End of Week 3.

Sorry for the late update. Literally left for Canada the day after the end of my first placement, so I haven't had time to update.

Anyways. This was my final week on my first placement. I realized that the patient I was originally going to use for my SSC project/essay does not fit the criteria for the essay. Therefore, I was out hunting for another SSC patient. Decided to take a stroll to the Coronary Care Unit to see if there are any straight forward patients. We met a patient who was quite talkative and in general well enough to talk to us. He had an MI and was waiting for a bypass surgery. This time I made sure we got every single bit of info we need for this essay and all in all it was a really straight forward patient history. Did cardio, respiratory, and abdominal physical examinations. The patient was really friendly and actually didn't want us to leave because he was so bored. Kinda feel bad for some of the patients as they really do look like they are bored out of their mind. Some of them don't even get patients so you really do sympathize.

Actually before we went SSC patient hunting (on Monday) we went to theatre to look for our consultant. We literally stood there for 1.5 hour as our consultant was late and we didn't want to risk missing him so we turned up quite early. Finally caught our consultant racing through the corridor and asked to meet him on Wednesday so we could get our proformas signed off. I swear those 1.5 hours were horrendous as nurses kept asking if we were alright and if we needed anything. Swear we nearly blended into the background.

So come Wednesday, our consultant had clinic so we went to meet him at his clinic...only to find out he isn't there yet and will be an hour late. Great. I decided to talk to the SHO and nurses about bariatric surgery as I was thinking of writing up about it for my 2nd SSC essay on ethics and law. Had a really really good conversation going and I learned quite a lot. It's all down to personal opinion and it is definitely an interesting topic. So an hour later, consultant turns up...only to be in a bad-ish mood and completely ignored my partner and I. We waited til the end of his clinic to talk to him. So we gave him our proformas for him to assess how we did in placement. He took our sheets, quickly glimpse and it, and just circled "Satisfactory" for each section. My partner and I were panicking and our consultant returned the sheets to us without leaving feedback. In general it is expected for us to get an overall mark of "Good" in placement or else the medical school may think we didn't show up to placement. So out of desperation we asked if we can show him what we have been doing on placement as he hasn't watched us therefore couldn't really mark us properly. We were hoping after showing him our work he would raise our grade. He told us to meet him in between surgery on Thursday at 12:30pm.

We get there at 12pm...he apparently finished his first surgery early and had an early lunch break so he could get on with his second surgery. So we stood in for one of his surgeries which was expected to be only 2 hours. Not bad right? Wrong...midway through surgery we had a complication and the surgery ended up taking 4.5 hours. My legs were not happy with me. I think at one point I lost feeling in my quads. After surgery, our consultant was obviously annoyed, but still managed to meet us. We gave him a new proforma and he was like "Didn't I sign something like this yesterday?". We pretty much told him it's a different sheet and it requires written feedback. Somehow he fell for it and before marking us we showed him all our patient histories we took over the 3 weeks. Despite all the effort...he still gave us "Satisfactory" but in the feedback he put down that it was difficult to mark us and was sure we were "good/excellent" students but he didn't get the opportunity to watch us in the wards. At least we got some sort of reason. But to be honest, we now understand why he gave us a "Satisfactory".

So on Friday, we actually had nothing to do and it was our last day. Went in at like 10pm and my partner and I decided to get assessed on our history and examination skills. I think I did alright in it, but was told that my smiling was unprofessional. Still confused about it because if I was a patient I wouldn't want to be greeted by a doctor looking like he/she doesn't give a crap and is in a bad mood. Anyways everyone has their own opinions but it was one feedback point that I will keep in the back of my mind but definitely won't change the way I greet patients. It's not like I excessively smile and laugh/be inappropriate with my facial expression. Just want to treat the patients like a person. It was a weird one to get my head around, and still kinda bothers me. Oh well. After the assessment, we managed to leave at like 12pm and returned our lockers and bleeps. Only if I could relax the minute I got home. It was more like "need to pack. need to pack. need to pack." I don't think I sat down at all for the rest of the day as I was running all over the place trying to get things done and running some final errands before I left.

All in all my first placement as a student doctor has been enjoyable and I definitely learned loads. When I return to placements at the end of September, I will be able to take bloods and do injections/perform invasive procedures, so I'm really looking forward to that. Shame I have 2 weeks of 9-5 lectures prior to my 2nd placements. Yuck.

But finally a week into holiday I've had my chance to sleep in and relax. Now getting to writing up my first SSC essay. The brain hardly wants to work though.

Anyways sorry again for the late update. Hope everyone is enjoying their holiday! Freshers week is getting closer! :D