Unreasonable.

One of my biggest pet peeves is when someone wrecks my lunch breaks for no reason. I don't mind missing my lunch because I am in theatre or doing something productive. Actually I don't mind if I'm in clinic and I have to delay my lunch...but what really drives me mental is when someone makes me MISS my lunch when it really didn't need to be missed.

I don't know if I am just being unreasonable or uncooperative, but essentially here's the story:

One week ago I gave notice that I have to attend a compulsory observation session at a clinic which is quite far away. I asked the secretary who does up my schedules if it will be possible for me to leave slightly earlier so I have some travel time and a time for me to eat my lunch. I was told by the secretary that it will be okay and she has left a note for the GP who I will be following in the morning.

Fast forward to today. I made sure I arrived early and kindly asked the GP if I could leave at 11am so I could go to my session at 12:30pm. Clinic usually ends at 11:30am so it wasn't like I'm asking to get off 2 hours early. It was simply just leaving 30 minutes early which is equivalent to seeing 2-3 patients. Despite seeing the note left for the GP about me leaving early, I was then given a fairly rude look and essentially was told why I can't leave after clinic (11:30am ish). Still maintaining my composure, I told the GP that I need to go home and drop off my car and then make my way to the other clinic (which has no parking hence I need to take the bus), and that I would like to have a bit of time to have some lunch as well. The drive home probably takes about 20-30 minutes depending on traffic, then another 30 minutes to travel to the other clinic. That would leave me about 30 minutes lunch break...which isn't unreasonably long. I explained this to the GP and she essentially didn't even listen and proceeded to interrupt me. She went on how I can leave at 11:30am and have my lunch on the go while traveling to the other clinic. I was obviously fuming as I do not understand what is the importance of me staying for an extra 30 minutes. Either way I just sit there and day dream as I don't do anything in clinic. I just sit and listen...and try to stay awake. I think the most annoying bit was the rude attitude the GP gave me first thing when I asked to leave early almost giving me the vibe that she's the "know it all - who are you to leave early" attitude. Hate it when people get all arrogant like that. I asked for permission a week in advance and again I'm only leaving 30 minutes early.

What also drove me mental was in the last 30 minutes of clinic....one patient needed a sick note/letter and another patient needed a wound to be checked for possible infection. Wow...that was surely useful....I couldn't help but give the GP a look of: "You seriously kept me an extra 30 minutes to see these things?!" Once the clinic was done all you could see behind me was a cloud of dust. Raced home and raced back out to clinic. No lunch. No snack. Didn't even have time to drop off my car keys. By the time I got to the other clinic...I felt like I was going to faint. I was starving and I had a smaller breakfast than usual as I thought I would be having an earlier lunch.

I mean I think the GP was being highly unreasonable and very inflexible especially when I had a valid reason and a reason which was something the medical school required me to attend. I wouldn't even care if I had to miss my lunch because an operation overran and we had to skip lunch so we will stay on time plus the consultant starves with you. I swear this GP did not help me with my experience with this placement so far. To most, if not all of you, you probably think this is such a small thing...why the heck is it bothering me so much. My tolerance for this placement is getting very thin and I am starting to really lose motivation in even putting in effort.

O&G - Done!

One of the most stressful days ever. Let's just say this placement never really got my heart rate and blood pressure up until today (my last day). Waited to do my final assessment with my supervisor and I was really stressed out. Hate waiting around. You see if this was one day earlier, I would not be as stressed out. I was a bit of a smart ass and booked to leave for home 1 day before official holiday. Seriously talk about luck. Supervisor couldn't do my assessment until my final day...5 hours before the departure of my train to go to the airport. Essentially, we are allowed to resit our assessment if our supervisor believe we are incompetent. You would usually resit the assessment immediately or the week after, BUT because we are doing our assessment in the final week  on my last day of placement, I don't really get another go. So that means I have ONE shot at this assessment. I pass...I pass. I fail...let's just say that is NOT an option. I essentially needed a bit of skill (to pass the assessment) and a heck lot of luck to not only pass my assessment, but to also catch my train. Doing an assessment is already stressful enough especially when you've got only 1 shot at it. Travelling is also another very stressful thing. Put the two together (assessment AND travelling) is the formula for a heart attack. Yes why should I be worrying about my assessment? I worked hard. I came in every day. Didn't skive. Studied...a bit. Practiced my examination skills quite a bit. So why am I not confident? Simple. Anything can happen eg. bad luck such as getting a difficult patient, blanking out aka brain fart, nerves, etc. I think I'm pretty chill with my supervisor and I don't really "fear" him that much, BUT at the end of the day yes he is a person...but he is also my SUPERVISOR, which I cannot forget. He essentially is the one who determines whether I pass or fail this placement. Kind of hard not to be a bit scared/nervous/stressed/intimidated.

Anyways luckily I passed my assessment and it all went very well. Got all my forms signed off, handed in my locker keys, and next thing I knew, I was saying my goodbyes to the staff and shaking hands with my supervisor: "I guess that's it. 7 weeks. Done. I really enjoyed the placement. Thank you. Maybe we will meet again in the future, maybe not. It was a pleasure to meet you and your team. Thanks again." It was probably the first genuine "thank you" I have said to a supervisor at the end of a placement. These last 7 weeks have opened my eyes and taught me not to judge. I have never done so much active learning in one placement. Best bit: I wanted to learn. I wasn't forced. What a great overall placement. I guess the only way to show your gratitude towards a placement is to work hard and show that you have learned. Actions certainly do speak louder than words. Even my good friend said that if only my supervisor saw what type of student I was on placements and how much I have changed in terms of motivation and work ethic - only then it is obvious how much I enjoyed this placement.

What a placement. Who would've thought.

Sh!t Hitting the Fan.

Oh wow...it is quite rare for me to leave work to the last minute. I should be panicking, but I'm not...well not just yet. I have 2 essays and 1 reflective writing to hand in on Monday. One of my essays is a case report, which I have finished...but it is still pretty rough. The other essay is an evidence based medicine essay, which requires me digging through a bunch of literature...haven't started that whatsoever. Reflective writing...I hope it doesn't take long as I haven't done that either, but I usually only take 10-15 minutes to do up reflective pieces. As you can tell...I'm not too shabby at reflecting (which I do believe is a very important part of the degree - can't improve if you can't reflect on your performance/day). It doesn't end there - I've got a summative assessment on Monday where I will be watched by a consultant in taking a full patient history and perform two systems examination (could be either Cardiovascular, Respiratory, GI, Peripheral Nervous System, Cranial Nerves, or Developmental examination). Afterwards I will be asked a few questions about the patient history such as differential diagnosis, management, investigations, pathophysiology, etc. Anything goes as long as it is relevant to the patient's condition. Will also be asked to present my findings on physical examinations. Ack. I mean taking a patient history and doing examinations is just a matter of practising which I think I've done enough of. I'm just worried about the questions my consultant will ask me.

This week has been fairly uneventful. I was only in for 3 days as I had a lot of meetings to attend. Because of all my meetings, I haven't been able to do an "on-call" from 9am-9pm, which means I have to do 2 on-calls in my final week of Paediatrics. Fun. Essentially I spent this week completing my log book in terms of getting my clinical skills signed off and getting a registrar to do my formative assessment for 3 systems examinations in preparation for my summative assessment for next Monday.  I also found this week incredibly hard to wake up. Every morning I was struggling to wake up. Thank goodness 1 more week of Paediatrics and travelling a long way to the peripheral hospital. Next placement is Obs+Gynaecology and the drive there is about 15 minutes so I won't have to wake up as early. PHEW. To be honest I'm quite sick of my placement now. 7 weeks is too long and I haven't really been having a great time either so that doesn't help with my experience. I'm usually bored and I generally feel quite unproductive. To be fair though, I still learned a lot especially on how to interact with children. Still something I'm struggling with, but if I compared myself to the first week of placement, I have definitely grown as a person and have learned some new skills. It'd be unfair for me to write this placement off as it has been very useful. Just not my "cup of tea". Can't love every placement. There will always be up and downs, but medical school is all about exploring specialties and learning about everything. As a medical student, you need to learn how to adapt and essentially "just get on with it". My basketball coach from high school always told me: "If you don't like it, too bad. Make the most of it. If not, just suck it up and keep going."

End of the Week.

What a week.

Driving to the peripheral hospital for 40 minutes each way every day does take a toll. Since Monday, I have been going in at about 9 or 10 am, which is considered a late start when compared to others. My consultant is fairly "slack" and told us not to come in too early because we do have to travel a long way and for safety sake not to tire us out too badly. Last few days my partner and I have been going around to different wards to take patient histories and do physical examinations. I swear we have not been that lucky this week. We have been given two patients on our ward who we should definitely speak to as they are quite interesting to talk to and one patient in particular is extremely fun to talk to. Every time we wanted to go speak to this one patient, he is asleep in his chair. We were told by the nurses and junior doctors to not wake him up as he gets tired quite easily (plus he is quite old). Finally, when my partner and I walked by his room he was awake so we went in to ask for permission to speak to him about his condition.

I am not kidding but I think the entire ward (nurses and junior doctors) were playing a mighty good prank on us. Here's the catch: this patient is almost completely deaf. We literally spoke right into his ear and he still could not hear us. My partner and I were absolutely baffled. We could not believe that the staff had been recommending us a patient who is deaf. The main point of patient histories is to ask questions and it does not exactly work if the patient cannot hear you. Now we feel like we are the joke of the ward. However I am VERY determined to get a patient history from this patient as I had a read through his notes and he is definitely an interesting patient. I think I will opt for the writing on a whiteboard to ask my questions.

After being absolutely baffled by this patient, my partner and I decided to abandon our ward and move to other wards to get patient histories. We went to the Cardiology ward and we managed to get a really good patient history. This particular patient was very kind and VERY patient with us. We visited him again today to do a Cardiovascular physical examination on him and again he was very cooperative and seemed really keen on helping us learn.

Today we also went to the respiratory ward and managed to get another patient history and do a respiratory physical examination. Despite being a Friday, I thought today was one of our most productive days. Last few days we were leaving early (e.g. 1:30pm-2:00pm) as we felt redundant. Today, we left feeling like we've done a lot and actually had some fun. Definitely a good way to end the week of placements.

Next week - hopefully we'll start off where we left off and continue to be productive. On Monday we will be doing a theatre list with our consultant so we'll finally see him again and hopefully get some teaching from him as well as he is amazing at teaching and very patient. I was also hoping to ask to be able to scrub in and maybe be a bit more interactive and try and help out as I think that is the best way to learn. Much better than standing in the corner of the room and trying not to be in the way.

Sorry for the long post. Will update hopefully soon. Have a good weekend!